When we absorb energy from others, we can be compared to vampires, but instead of drawing blood, we drain and consume energy.
Energy vampires aren’t content with just feeding off one person; some of them are skilled enough to emanate such negativity that they can suck the energy out of an entire room.
If you’ve ever felt a sudden shift in the atmosphere when someone walks into a room, as if all the energy has been sapped, then chances are that the individual is a proficient energy vampire who can drain the energy in one fell swoop.
Think of our energy field (also known as electromagnetic field or aura) as an electric cable that dangles from us at all times. Anyone can come along and grip it, plugging it into their energy field.
Once connected, the current flows continuously back and forth between us. However, with an energy vampire, there’s a valve on the cable that prevents energy from flowing back to us. There’s no mutual exchange, just a one-way flow of energy leaving us and pouring into the person on the receiving end.
The more unaware we are of this and the longer we allow them to remain connected to our energy, the more ungrounded, debilitated, and exhausted we become.
Energy vampires are typically obsessed with egotistical gains, and their lives are superficial because their focus and attachments are predominantly external. As a result, materialism, finances, power, and status all have an exceptionally high ranking for them.
Energy vampires receive their energy refueling through validation, praise, flattery, fear, or when they’re seen as superior to others.
Energy imbalances between individuals make it easy for energy to be transferred from one person to another. For instance, a teacher and a student, a parent and child, or individuals with opposing levels of education or experience. The extent of the imbalance depends on the internal beliefs held by each person in the dynamic.
Since energy vampires have little connection to their core selves, they are unable to nourish and refuel from within. It’s easier for them to seek out other people to recharge their energy than to put in the work needed to create a meaningful life that is directly connected to their inner self. A life where they don’t rely on anyone else’s energy for power, inspiration, motivation, or inner strength, as all of these things will be firmly established when their lifestyle reflects what matters deeply to them.
Essentially, energy vampires must first discover their life’s purpose, accept themselves as they are, and build a life that provides deep meaning and nourishment before they can fully energize themselves independently.
Energy vampires may have been “victims” themselves, bitten energetically by another vampire who drained their energy. They may have learned to absorb energy as a behavior picked up from their caregivers.
Perhaps they have experienced words or actions that made them feel inadequate or unworthy. They may have suffered abuse or be going through a traumatic period, leading to a build-up of negative emotions.
Alternatively, energy vampires may believe themselves to be superior to others, finding it easy to overpower and drain others through the resulting energy imbalance.
Taking other people’s energy can become a habit for vampires, one that feels pleasurable and natural to them. In turn, allowing energy vampires to take our energy may also feel natural if it has been a consistent pattern throughout our lives.
Whenever we feel insecure or have a need to prove our worth, consciously or unconsciously, we seek validation from others.
Energy vampires may not always display emotional or energetic negativity on the surface. They can appear to be optimistic, positive, energetic, and thriving in life, but this is just a facade. They excel in absorbing energy from others, which fuels their facade.
Energy vampires can exhibit various behaviors such as being highly dramatic or seductive, constantly needing attention, being shy and reserved while needing a boost, or being passive-aggressive and moody with frequent temper tantrums. They may also look to blame, humiliate, shame, and make others feel guilty instead of acknowledging their own behavior.
Often, at the core of energy draining behavior lies fear. The fear that the person may have encountered or is currently experiencing has left them feeling depleted of energy, and this is what drives them to absorb energy from others.
Vampires and their victims often get caught up in a codependent relationship where the vampire offers some form of exchange in return for energy, whether it’s financial benefits or making the victim feel better about themselves.
When a vampire needs a recharge, they will resort to various tactics to extract energy from someone else. Even though it appears to be a fair exchange, neither party gains something that will lead to permanent harmony or healthy nourishment.
Both parties may find themselves craving and becoming highly dependent on this temporary fix, rather than looking inward to address the root cause of what’s missing.
Here are some methods that individuals may use to disrupt the balance and extract energy:
>> Boasting about material possessions or finances.
>> A situation where one person is trying to make the other feel envious or jealous.
>> Using sexual or predatory behavior to destabilize the other person.
>> Using hurtful words to make the other person feel inadequate.
>> Deliberately crying or dramatic emotional displays to gain a reaction.
>> Intentionally using intellect or knowledge with the aim of making other people feel incompetent or uneducated.
>> Using extreme discipline to show control.
>> Using flattery to overemphasize aspects of a person’s character or physical attributes to seduce or derail them.
>> Extremely revealing outfits that have only been worn to seek out attention.
>> Saying something that appears nice while body language, intention, energy, or facial expressions send the opposite signals (passive-aggressive).
>> Using silent treatment, violence, or being overly competitive and flaunting success.
>> Complaining and criticizing everything and everyone without doing anything to resolve or rectify situations.
>> Dramatically overreacting in public to gain attention.
>> Trying to prove they are right and the other person is wrong.
>> Dominating and exerting control.
>> Using threats to make the other person feel fearful.
>> Trying to gain sympathy by falsely appearing as a “victim.”
>> Displaying insecure or immature behaviors to gain validation or reassurance.
>> Trying to make others feel guilty.
Some traits of an energy vampire are: abusive, aggressive, angry, apologetic, charismatic, coercive, controlling, dependent, domineering, envious, jealous, possessive, resentful, seductive.
Rather than engaging with energy vampires in a futile attempt to reason, negotiate, or interact with them, we can take charge of our own behavior and show ourselves warmth, compassion, unconditional love, and acceptance.
Every individual has the ability to connect with their own source of vital energy. When we supply others with energy, we are ultimately preventing them from relying on themselves and becoming stronger.
Instead of providing them with a temporary fix, we should allow them the opportunity to provide for themselves independently.
Energy vampires can only begin to look within themselves for their energy source when they realize that we won’t sacrifice our own vitality to feed them. Although it can be difficult to cut off the energy supply, it’s ultimately beneficial because it encourages energy vampires to take responsibility for finding their own source of vitality.
It’s important to remember that we can’t control whether energy vampires seek out someone else to meet their needs. However, if we take accountability for their energy, we only weaken them by enabling their dependence on us. It’s crucial that we prioritize self-preservation and protect our own life force energy.
As Prince Ea says, “We are all responsible for rowing our own boat.”
Writing: Alex Myles
Image Flickr Lily Laurent